Book review: ‘Fifty Shades Freed’ offers nothing more to trilogy
Editor’s Note: This is the third review of a three-part novel series by E.L. James. To read the first two reviews, visit OUDaily.com.
Rating: 1 star
At this point, I just had to know the ending.
I know I’ve been droning on about how these novels really suck, but in reality, I always knew I was going to read all of them.
These novels are a total mess, but I had to know how bad the ending was going to be. “Fifty Shades Freed” didn’t disappoint me, because I didn’t expect anything good.
In the final novel, Ana Steele and Christian Grey are married and are now on their honeymoon.
At A Glance:
"50 Shades Freed"
Author: E.L. James
Publish date: April 17
Grey showers her with gifts, but Steele claims she didn’t marry him for his money. I can almost hear the collective sigh of the middle-aged housewives who dream of this ridiculous lifestyle.
As they return to their home in Seattle and back to their respective jobs, Steele is immediately promoted to editor of the book publishing company she works for, and Grey has bought her publishing company and plans to make her president.
Not only are you married to a super hot CEO who immediately fell head-over-heels for you, but now you can run your own company too. Boom. It’s that easy.
Of course, problems with stalker bosses, ex-submissives hell-bent on meeting the new Mrs. Grey and some other surprises fill the space in between the beginning and the happily ever after, but the reader already knows everything ends up working well for the couple.
One of the many things that kills me in this novel is the whole I’ll-do-whatever-you-say bit.
Grey literally dictates everything Steele does in her life, yet she’s totally cool with it. She has to ask permission to drive her car to work, eat what food she wants and go to the bathroom — kidding on that last example, but I wouldn’t be surprised if she did.
It’s so annoying that the author assumes this is completely OK, but I guess I shouldn’t be bent out-of-shape about it considering the other useless, sexist content.
Speaking of sex, the sex scenes in the novel go into all of the usual gory details.
At this point, nothing fazes me. It feels like I’m reading the same novel over and over again, with most of the pages talking about the couple’s latest sex adventure, peppered with little pieces of the plot here and there.
The most powerful emotion I’ve felt from these novels is the extreme horror I felt when my 47-year-old mother called me last week and asked if I wanted to borrow these disturbing novels from her.
I honestly don’t know what’s worse: The fact that I actually paid money and read all three of these novels, or that my mother wanted to talk about them.
In short, the only things I’ll take away from this trilogy are an extreme fear of older women talking about the novels and the lingering feeling of shame — because I know I will probably end up going to see the movie.
I feel sorry for myself.
Katie Piper is a journalism senior.