We all say it: one of our friends says something completely foolish like “President Barack Obama is a Muslim,” we hear about how somebody started studying for a midterm the day of the test or how someone blatantly copied an online paper and submitted it. We use the word all the time. Retarded.
I admit I have used this word frequently to describe how stupid a person has been or how ridiculous a certain homework assignment or exam question was. No doubt most of us have used this word in a similar context.
We don’t ever have any cruel or foul intentions when we call something “retarded,” rather, we are just describing something in the best way we deem possible.
However, each time we call something or someone “retarded,” we are committing a great offense to those in our community, family and friends who are often unable to defend themselves.
When they were first introduced, the words “mental retardation” or “mentally retarded” were medical terms used to describe those with intellectual disabilities in a clinical setting.
Today, the words “retard” and “retarded” have evolved to become synonymous with pejorative terms like “dumb” and “stupid.”
In 2004, at the request of Special Olympic athletes, the Special Olympics changed their terminology and classification of athletes from “mental retardation” to “intellectual disability.”
In addition, in 2008 the Special Olympics launched the site www.r-word.org to fight the inappropriate use of “retarded” in common language.
I became aware of my insensitivity to the “r-word” while watching The Colbert Report last week as Tim Shriver, the Special Olympics Chairman, served as Colbert’s guest for the evening.
As I listened to Shriver explain to Colbert and his audience about the inappropriate use of words like “retard” and “retarded.” I began to realize how close-minded and crass we all have unintentionally been.
The Special Olympics aims to amplify the gifts and positive attributes of its participants’ lives, while dispelling the stereotypes and negative attitudes that most view them with.
“Retarded” has now been so closely associated with stupidity and idiocy that to continue labeling those with intellectual disabilities with the term is not only an insult to the tremendous work that organizations like the Special Olympics do, but an insult to millions all over the world who live with such disabilities.
As individuals, we all have our own gifts and strengths that we should be proud of. When we label a foolish friend who got a DUI when he could have called SafeRide as retarded, and in the same token describe those with intellectual disabilities with the same word, we are demonstrating a severe form of intolerance and ignorance.
Regardless of whether we mean it or not, we are essentially categorizing all those with intellectual disabilities as idiots and voicing a sense of superiority over them.
In using the r-word we continually forget about the courage and fortitude of those who are intellectually disabled. We continually dehumanize and mock those who are contributing members of society and have done no wrong to us.
There are Special Olympics athletes who can accomplish physical feats that most of us would never dream of. But do we call ourselves physical retards? Of course not.
Obviously, most of us who have used the r-word have not meant it with such negative connotation. However, to those family, friends, and those with actual intellectual disabilities, as people continually label them as “retarded,” we are committing a form of hate speech.
It is time for us to curb our usage of this word, and end the discrimination, exclusivity and intolerance that go along with it.
— Mubeen Shakir, University College freshman
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123abc 1 year, 1 month ago
I am a Parent of a child with autism and the founder of a Parent support group in Bronx NY.
on behalf of all of the people and families dealing with intellectual disabilities.... Thank You for this article.
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
Words aren't particularly powerful or offensive unless you allow them to be. My suggestion? Don't lend the word any more power by writing op/ed's about it. Stop using it if you like, but don't retard the vocabulary of those of us who, when using the word, don't give a moment's thought to those with disabilities.
The word "retard" does have other meanings, no? Perhaps when someone uses it, the just mean exactly what they said. If I were to call you retarded for writing this op/ed, it wouldn't be for want or desire to lump you with those who have disabilities. It would be because this sort of drivel impedes others' ability to get on with their day, and you have, by submitting this article, become the mechanism by which said retardation occurs.
Isn't it possible that when someone says a word, they don't account for the countless other ways that you might interpret it? Perhaps you should reevaluate your vocabulary rather than make a blanket generalization about the word usage of others.
We don't have to be apologists for being born without a particular medical condition, why start now?
pink 1 year, 1 month ago
I feel as though I should apologize for the lack of tack used in the previous post. I do not know who wrote it, nor do I care. The article that was written was thoughtful and and eye opening. I teach my students and children alike to use kind words - words that in no way could offend others intentionally. When we use the word "retard" or "retarded" we use it in a derogatory form more times than not; not the "other meanings" as mentioned in the previous response. No one said to never use the word "retard" if it truly means to obstruct or be delayed. Of course it is acceptable to use in this manner. However, used in the derogatory sense, it is offensive and with so many different disabilites affecting our children and adults today, no one should feel put down. Try explaining to a young child that the adult or teen that used the r-word when refering to a buddy that they didn't mean to be offensive; they were just joking around. Much easier said than done.
Thank you for the article. It is nice to know what the next generation of young adults still show compassion to those around them.
meANDmy_monkey 1 year, 1 month ago
What a gay column.
mld123 1 year, 1 month ago
"We don't have to be apologists for being born without a particular medical condition, why start now?"
No, don't ever apologize...but be grateful to God for what He gave you and compassionate to those who you perceive to be given less. Maybe if you get to know them, you will learn that they have been given so much more than all of us and deserve the respect and kindness that all of us as human beings deserve. I hope that one day you are blessed with a special needs child and can learn what an incredible blessing it actually is... you don't seem like a very nice person now, so maybe you need to be touched by an angel!
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
pink - Words don't have any meaning until you interpret them. I don't know how this can be made clearer. If you get offended by someone else using a word in a particular way, you really should look at yourself.
Would calling someone who has Down's syndrome "retarded" be mean? Perhaps. Should you grandstand about how other people use words? Definitely not. Using the logic in your response, try explaining to a young child that when you say a particular word, it makes people who can't hear the utterance upset by way of magic projection. That's a tough one to prove.
What you can teach young children is how to speak responsibly. Perhaps you shouldn’t teach a young child that certain words are off-limits. Additionally, the idea that a word could somehow encapsulate the entirety of any particular person is more offensive to me that any possible usage of the word “retard.”
Would someone mocking a person with autism find another way to be a jerk? Absolutely.
What if you were bothered if I said, “Hey, don’t mind pink – he/she is slow.” How about, “Hey it’s ok kiddo, some people are just born with less mental capacity than others. It’s not pink’s fault that he/she would rather apologize for someone response than critically analyze the situation.” Should we then ban the word “slow” or the phrase “less mental capacity?” Clearly not, as you would be taking issue with the context of the statement, not the words themselves. Where then is this etiquette line drawn? Should any phrase that can cause emotional distress be removed from our lexicon of speech?
Your problem lies within the ability for one person to be a jerk to another – something that can happen regardless of the words being used.
I understand wanting to be sad about people who don’t have it as nice as you do – empathy is a good thing. It’s not a good thing, however, to preach about anyone’s word usage other than your own. After all, words don’t have any meaning except whatever meaning you ascribe to them.
I think you should quit hating on disabled peoples.
mld123 – are you seriously hoping that when I have a child, that they have some terrible disease and/or syndrome? That’s not very Christian of you.
You claim in your comment that I don’t seem very nice and then you wish for my future child(ren) to be disabled in some fashion to prove a point to me. What a nice person you are!
I would never hope that your children come out all messed up, although if you honestly think that angels touch people, this harsh truth may be unavoidable for your offspring. There is no god, take care.
Quincy 1 year, 1 month ago
As a person with a sister born with Down Syndrome, it is such a relief to see an article like this. I am and have been involved with the Special Olympics for some years now since my sister is an athlete in the games. Lately, Special Olympics has put forth extra effort to notify the public of the consequences of using a word such as "retard". Many of my friends have been caught in front of me using the word, however; a simple please don't use that word seems to get the point across. It's so disappointing to hear someone use that insulting word and not even know the consequences of it. The appropriate term today to use is mentally handicapped. However, these people are not handicapped in any way. In fact, we could learn a lot from these sweet people. Have you ever seen someone stop in the middle of a race just to help someone that has fallen down? I have. Have you ever seen someone remember nearly 300 strangers’ names, his or her hobbies, boyfriends and family just because they care? I have. Have you ever seen someone who would never, could never, harm anyone or anything simply because they don’t even know how or why someone would do that? My sister is one of these people. She doesn’t think of herself as handicapped though. In fact, never mention the word around her. She is a successful individual who has worked her way up a career ladder. She has held the same job for nearly five years. There are many people out there today who cannot say that. She currently works at Couch cafeteria at the Chick-fil-a station. Everyone knows her. She is always interested in talking to whoever dares approaches her booth for some chicken nuggets. What’s your name? Where are you from? What high school did you go to? And of course, the famous do you know my sister question…How could anyone feel more loved than having a complete stranger completely wrapped up in finding out all about your life simply because she cares that much about you? And who cares if she may be holding the line up because she’s mystified by the fact that you’re an engineer major? You’ll get your turn. On March 3, 2011 a national campaign was launched called Spread the Word to End the Word. People all over the world signed pledges vowing to help stop the spread of this hateful word. (http://www.r-word.org/) Nearly 203,000 people pledged online. Times are changing and for the better. This word is not only hurtful to those who are mentally handicapped, but to their friends and family as well. So do your part and spread the word to end the word. Thanks so much for this article and educating everyone out there about this tragedy.
MustangMike 1 year, 1 month ago
This article is spot on. I appreciate having my eyes opened further. I am certain, for those of you who feel the rest of the world needs to adjust to your lack of decorum, and your lack of vocabulary; the word stands as reference for yourselves. Meanwhile, everyone else deserves our respect.
anth1032 1 year, 1 month ago
Thank you sir for bringing this issue to light. It warms my heart to know that there are other young people like myself out there who believe that those who are mentally handicapped are people too and deserve respect as much as 'normal' people do. I have always had a caring heart for those less fortunate than me and the people you address in this article are no exception. I admire those people greatly because they have such passion for life and are so pure of heart that I consider them to be angels. Although I haven't helped out in the Special Olympics but I have helped out in numerous charities that are designed to help those who are mentally handicapped. Being involved in those charities were the most emotionally and spiritually enriching experiences of my life. I need to get involved in those again. Again thank you very much for writing such a thoughtful and heartfelt article. Blessings on to you.
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
MustangMike - You should reread your statement. The irony is astonishing.
"Hey Bubba, this here statue of David or something is really making me angry. We should put some coveralls on it so people can't see his no-no parts."
Likewise, we have you, in a thinly veiled attempt to call those of us who understand language and its interpretation retarded, suggesting that we should stop using a word because it makes you uncomfortable.
Also, it's not a matter of respect or disrespect. Since when does having a different opinion necessarily equate to being disrespectful? I find it disrespectful to volunteer to crusade for the sake of an entire population who may or not even care about your crusade. Some do, no doubt but the lot of people with Down’s syndrome that I’ve encountered (yes, I have volunteered to help special needs groups) seem to have predominantly great days and do just fine without your intervention. It’s not like they sit around all day and wish that they were you. We can be thankful for that too.
Maybe, as a point of practice, you should exercise some of your precious empathy and try to understand another's opinion. Or, are people with disabilities so dear to us that we no longer have to afford those who would question a call to ban a word or phrase even the merest reading comprehension; we can simply lash out at them blindly and without question.
Perhaps even with a sardonic insult to boot.
casualobserver 1 year, 1 month ago
speaking of labels, pinchfist, should we label you a douchebag or an ahole? Said without empathy or disrepect, just describing what one would think of when reading your comments.
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
casualobserver - I'd prefer the label, "not an idiot." The other words offend me, thanks for not using them.
yoyoyo 1 year, 1 month ago
I like how you say that "dumb" is an acceptable alternative to "retarded". As dumb refers to those medically unable to speak, I suggest you research a bit more.
LaCalavera 1 year, 1 month ago
Words can be hurtful. Sometimes people are insensitive to others and don't consider what their words may do. Maybe if we thought of people besides ourselves more we could avoid some of this hurtfulness. Just my opinion of course. I thought it was a very considerate article.
sf917 1 year, 1 month ago
Pinchfist, I understand that you think that what's suggested in the article - omitting offensive parts of vocabulary in an effort to spare people pain - helps no one and in fact is detrimental in some ways. But this begs the question, what does keeping "retard" in your vocabulary do for you? I don't mean "retard" in the sense that one says "his speed was retarded by the wind," but rather in the sense that one says "did you see what he did? That guy is such a retard." Does retaining this use of the word help anyone? Your argument seems to connote that Mubeen is rallying for a 1984-esque eradication of offensive words. It seems to me, however, that he's rallying for people to be more considerate and empathetic.
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
sj917 – First, thank you for a reasoned response, I appreciate your candor.
I agree that people ought to be more sympathetic toward others. I am not suggesting that one should call another a nasty name based on a condition of characteristic that they acquired or were born with through no fault of their own. What I hoped to convey is that the author takes issue with people being inconsiderate, not the words themselves. Calling for a ban on a word or phrase is silly and takes away from the actual issue.
Mubeen is wrong to assert that using any word necessarily means that the user of the word has some ill-will toward or ignore the plight of those with disabilities. It’s a baseless assertion and it is simply not true. He goes on to admit as much in his last paragraph. That one line, however, doesn’t free him from his argument’s fulcrum. He insists that by using this word, people tacitly, implicitly, or explicitly abuse those with some sort of medical condition and this is simply not correct.
Going to a predominantly black neighborhood and screaming racial epithets isn’t a wise or thoughtful thing to do, no doubt. I’m not suggesting that someone should do that, nor am I suggesting that, in the event that they chose to do it, there wouldn’t be consequences.
As for why I choose to use the word “retard” – I think about its real definition and when I use it, it is with the full understanding of what it means to retard something. When I call another retarded, it is not out of respect for a medical condition – I use that word because I think they are impeding something in some way - a mechanism of retardation.
How do you use the word “crazy?”
I honestly don’t care how you use the word – the point is that it was once a medical term too, and yet we all find ways to use it.
How about these words, maniac, dwarf, cabbage, vegetable, backward, spastic, imbecile, midget?
Pinchfist 1 year, 1 month ago
(cont'd)
Mubeen’s argument is a straw-man for being courteous to one another and , more specifically, being courteous to a population that many who use the term in question have no interaction with whatsoever. I have nothing wrong with trying to inform people that there are those around us who deserve our respect and I certainly have nothing wrong with people being nicer to each other. This is not what these campaigns to rally against a word stand for. They cloud the real issue and, most importantly, give people a sense that they’ve achieved something by doing absolutely nothing. Perhaps instead of the time it took to make that article, Mubeen could have volunteered to help a local Special Olympics chapter. That would have made a difference. Instead, he insults our intelligence by insisting that we’ve done something wrong by using a word that he, and others, have declared “bad.” That is retardation in its most pure form.
Assaulting language when you are upset about a medical condition that others have is both retarding the concept of language and, most importantly in this case, the efforts to create a more equal and more informed populous who are genuinely concerned for the rights and well-being of those who weren’t born the same way as the majority. To shift the blame to a word (and in doing so, shifting blame to people who in no way, shape, or form intend harm) is to ignore the fact that people have the capacity to be real jerks sometimes. Am I defending these jerks? Not at all. I’m simply trying to convey my displeasure of being accused of insulting a community that I’ve actually gone above and beyond to work with.
Mubeen and others who rally behind the removal of a word from our collective vocabulary are fighting windmills with swords made of silly putty. Worse yet, after pledging not to use the word or some other such nonsense, they feel like they’ve actually contributed when in reality, they’ve done nothing at all.
It’s like rallying against the sky when it fails to rain.
I happen to think that students at OU have the potential to be much more helpful than Mubeen gives them credit for.
kunwoo32 1 year, 1 month ago
I have some sympathies for the people who argue that those who use the term "retarted" pejoratively do not mean to associate the recipient of the word with people who possess mental uniquenesses. On the flip side I would like to consider this hypothetical situation: imagine in a hundred years from now people use the term "Christian" or "Muslim" in a derogatory manner, similar to the use of the word "retarted". Even if these people did not have Christians or Muslims in mind when using these words pejoratively, I would still be offended by such degradation of English.
Now take the word "Jew". Perhaps when people use the term "retarted" they do not intend to establish an association with mentally unique people. However when one uses the term "Jew" in a belittling manner, one is intentionally establishing a negative connotation to the Jewish community. What makes these terms, "retarded" and "Jew" different? The difference is how many people remember the original meaning of the word. I really appreciate yoyoyo's and Pinchfist's insights on language, and I believe that if a few decades from now all people forget the original medical term of "retarted", then it will be ok to use the term "retarted" pejoratively. However what makes the term "retarted" taboo to use is the fact that people still remember it's medical meaning. It was claimed earlier that one can use the term "retarded" and have it mean only what the speaker intended it to mean. This neglects the fact that the listener will interpret the word his/her way irregardless of the speaker's intent.
It was very nicely put that this article is about respect for other people. Not only should we have respect for mentally unique people, but we should also respect other people's desire to hold the medical meaning of the word "retarded". Even if one has no foul intention of mentally unique people when one uses the term "retarded" degradingly, one should still refrain from using the word in order to not offend other people. It is better for one to willing refrain his/her own right to free language for a moment, than spend hours explaining the semantics of a word to the person one has accidently offended.
It was suggested earlier that Mr. Shakir was wasting his time bashing people for their language when there exists more important and offensive matters. We must remember that there would still exist tension between different parties over this word even if Mr. Shakir had not published this article. I applaud him for spending the time to allow us to have this forum of discussion so that we might hopefully walk away with a deeper perspective concerning both mentally unique individuals, as well as the pragmatics of language.