I begin this column by saying the sweater vest might be the most impractical and useless pieces of clothing ever invented. You disagree do you? Well, I’ll leave you with two reasons; One,) it’s just sweater without sleeves so you’re getting a little over half of what you paid for. Two,) it’s extremely misleading because it doesn’t really function as a sweater.
See, heat escapes through your limbs and a normal sweater — with sleeves of course — is suppose to contain that heat making you warm and toasty. Though a sweater vest protects your torso, it’s not really doing much.
In spite of the ineffective design, sweater vests are everywhere. Just take a look around you; everyone is wearing one and for the longest time I couldn’t figure out why anyone would put one on. From my life -long exposure to bad sitcoms, I felt the sweater vest was reserved strictly for rich people, academics, golf players and nerds (nerds and academics are not the same) so it surprised me that just anyone was wearing one.
This sweater vest “phenomenon” predated the nerd=cool, prep school, hipster look complete with the brightly colored hoodies, bowties and Urkel frame glasses that we both know you don’t have a prescription for. Yet I still couldn’t place my finger on what would drive people to reach into their pockets and pay for something they’d still have to wear a jacket over in cold weather.
Then I figured it out — people buy sweater vests for the same superficial reason that guys buy $200 Nikes and women spend hundreds of dollars on jewelry — they look pretty.
That might be over simplifying it, but sweater vests when worn appropriately could act as the perfect garnish to your outfit bringing out it’s hidden potential. For example, when worn with a nice blazer and slacks, an argyle sweater vest could transform your outfit to an informal three-piece suit that’s great for almost any occasion. Another advantage of the sweater vest is it’s flexibility; it can be worn in any kind of weather, though that depends on what you are wearing with the outfit or not wearing.
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