Some save lips for marriage
Laura Abington and her fiancé, Jon Malone, are like any other engaged couple, except for one thing: they have never kissed each other.
Malone, English education graduate student, said he chose to wait to kiss Abington, math education senior, because he thinks a relationship before marriage should not be primarily physical.
“I think this time is for other things, particularly since our convictions are from the Bible, as far as its views on the nature of sex before marriage,” he said.
Malone said keeping the physical aspect out of the relationship has promoted better communication and allowed them to cultivate the mental and spiritual aspects of their relationship. It has also eliminated any temptation to go beyond kissing, he said.
“I really love Laura and I care for her, but I care for her enough that I don’t want to think of her in a purely physical way at this point because that would be my tendency,” Malone said.
Malone said he and Abington will probably kiss before their wedding date in June, if they think the time is right.
“It’s more my conviction than hers,” he said.
Although Malone and Abington’s wedding day kiss may not be their first, University College freshman Hannah Cooney’s will be.
Even though she has not met her husband yet, she is saving her first kiss for him. Like Malone and Abington, Cooney said religion played a pivotal role in her decision.
Cooney said she thinks she would become attached to anyone she kissed and wants to be attached in such a way only to her future husband.
“It’s like a piece of my heart that I’m giving away to someone else that I can’t ever fully get back,” she said. “If I don’t kiss anyone until I get married, then I still have all of myself for [my husband].”
Cooney hopes saving her first kiss for her husband will make their bond stronger.
“If I draw the line here, that means that, entering into marriage, my memory of my first kiss will definitely be with him,” she said.
No one pressured Cooney into her decision not to kiss before marriage. While she grew up in a Christian home, she said the choice was her own.
Malone said he also made his own decision, but advice from older married couples influenced his choice.
“They said to allow your relationship to develop,” he said. “One thing they regretted was they went too fast physically.”
Abington said she is glad she and Malone have waited to kiss.
“We don’t have to be constantly thinking about that or worry about that part of the relationship,” she said. “I think that’s really sweet and good.”
Waiting to kiss is something Cooney said she knows she will not regret. Even though her first kiss will be in public, she does not mind waiting.
“I’m hoping that my husband can see that decision I’ve made and say, ‘This girl is really quality,’” she said. “It would encourage him to be faithful to me, the way that I’ve been faithful to him before I even knew who he was.”